04.25 to 04.28 - I Am One With Austin

My cousin and I decided to take a spontaneous trip out to Austin this weekend to visit our other cousin. Good times were had. Good food was eaten. Very very good food. I have nothing else to say.

This is the mama of all Mickey D's ice cream cones:

Some good ribs and brisket:


The best darn breakfast buffet EVER:

Plate One

Plate Two

FATTIE RATING: 5!!

04.24 - Oh, Honey Bear.

I've been feeling pretty sickly lately, so unfortunately, I haven't really eaten anything noteworthy. I do want to talk about the interesting food-related occurrence of the day, though. My friend offered to give me some of his bougie ginger peach tea this afternoon since I wasn't feeling well, so the two of us went into the work kitchen to get some hot water and to begin steeping. I made sure to grab my old bear-shaped bottle of honey to add into my tea since my throat felt a bit scratchy. While we were waiting for our tea to steep in the kitchen, I looked at my honey bear and saw that the honey had crystallized and set. Pooh. So I decided to put the bottle in the microwave for 20 seconds. No biggie, right?

Little did I know, though . . . that the stupid work microwave is on steroids! 20 seconds pretty much equals a minute. When I took the honey bear out, the honey was boiling and the bear had some major plastic surgery done. My friend said, "Does the bear look deformed to you?" just as I felt the cap moving in my hands. Before I could even do anything, the bottle popped, the cap went flying towards my friend, and honey was EVERYWHERE (including on his forearm and my hands). He swore, I screamed, a passerby came to see if we were okay, and the kitchen smelled like boiling honey pee. Seriously. I don't know where the pee smell came from. Long story short: we did not suffer third-degree burns, the entire office pretty much walked by to see me scrubbing the floor in all my misery, and poor coworkers of mine will most likely find hardened honey in the nooks and crannies of that kitchen for years to come.

Note to self: Honey bears do not like the microwave.



FATTIE RATING: 3.5
STRUGGLOR RATING: 5!!

04.21 to 04.23 - Old Food is Bad Food

Just because something has been frozen or refrigerated does not mean it will stay edible forever. Common sense, right? Too bad I like to go against common sense. :\ On two different days now, I've eaten old food that I've questioned the "goodness" of . . . only to find out (after the fact) that I was right. Very very right . . . *sigh*

The Bad Food:
+ three-week old refrigerated leftover canned corned beef (I was just asking for it with this)
+ one-year old (?) meatballs & mozzarella Lean Pockets (the shell of ice crystals around each one should have been sufficient warning)

The Good Food:
+ buffalo chicken pizza (quite delicious)
+ smoked BBQ brisket with Carolina sauce (best damn brisket I've ever had...)
+ smoked baby back and St. Louis ribs (mmm)
+ peach cobbler (oh man . . . so good)

FATTIE RATING: 4.5

04.18 to 04.20 - Thighs of Thunder

I had quite a weekend. It started on Friday when my two girlfriends and I stopped by The Warehouse Sale (for designer jeans) at Navy Pier right after we got off of work. It was not as enjoyable as I thought it would be-- especially since it involved endless rows of expensive jeans, hundreds of frantic women, long lines, a communal women's fitting room that revealed all sorts of cellulite, and . . . a moment of heart-wrenching disappointment when I realized my thighs were the ultimate barrier to all designer jeans. *sigh*

I drowned my sorrows in delicious sushi that night, and then I worked out the next morning upon remembering my epiphany the night before. I proceeded to drown my sorrows in Chicago hotdogs at the Cubs game immediately after, and then slept the rest of the night. The next morning, I repented of my gluttony, and then single-handedly ate half of the honey-baked ham at my aunt's house.

Anyway, besides hot dogs and honey-baked ham, the sushi was a definite food highlight of my weekend. So yeah. I understand having the occasional pregnant belly, but what's up with the thunder? *innocent look, shrug* I don't get it.



FATTIE RATING: 4.5

04.09 to 04.17 - Umm . . .

I'm sure you already know what's going on. *sigh* Yes . . . I've eaten in secret. I'm like that chubby little girl that hides in her closet amongst all her lazy-eyed dust-covered dolls, stuffing her face with Twinkies and HoHos, in constant fear that her gorgeous, skinny mother will find out.

But fine . . . I shall confess. I ate all 9 days! Ha. And it wasn't pretty. Yummy, though-- but not pretty. :\

My highlights:
+ ground beef burrito suizo (salty, cheesy, fatty goodness)
+ Greek food (particularly that delectable flaming cheese...oh man)
+ fried chicken and waffles with a side of mac and cheese (helllo)
+ chicken parmesan and sausage lasagna (yum)
+ pizza pizza (an enjoyable blend of thin crust and deep dish)
+ ham, egg, and cheese panini (for the love of butter and cheese together...)

FATTIE RATING: 4.75

04.03 to 04.08 - Lazy Shmazy

I have been so lazy and preoccupied lately, especially when it comes to writing about food. I haven't been on Yelp in forever either. Still, that hasn't stopped me from actually partaking in the consumption of food. I have eaten well. Do not worry. All is right with the world.

Food highlights:
+ a quartet of hot dogs (so good-- and I only had a half of each, don't worry)

+ that same carne asada I raved about last week (ha)

+ steamed Maryland blue crabs (mmm)

+ sour pork sausage (don't ask-- just know it was delicious and deadly)

+ baby back ribs & St. Louis style ribs (yum)

+ Indian buffet (oh, how I missed you)

FATTIE RATING: 4.5

03.31 to 04.02 - Blah Blah Blah

Food has started to make me feel a little blah lately-- mainly because it's like a love/hate relationship. I love to eat, but I hate how flabby it makes me.

Some food highlights over the last three days:
+ fried chicken wings (mmm)
+ Chicago-style hot dog with everything on it
+ a cup of chili with sour cream, cheese, and onions on top (best damn chili I've had in awhile...or ever)
+ strawberry yogurt parfait (I am addicted)

FATTIE RATING: 4.25